Women & Masajids in Asian Muslim Countries

This was an issue that I was meaning to write about in the past few days. An issue I think that needs to be dealt with.

Two years ago, when I was visiting Pakistan [Karachi], after quite an interval I was a bit surpised to realise none of the Women went to the Mosques. Not for Jumuah prayers or Eid. Then I also found out, most Masajids do not even have a space for Women.

I go the Friday Prayers regularly and it is normal for me to do so. As it is for a lot of Women who attend Jumuah prayers. So let’s just say, I was a tad bit disappointed. Although I still go to go as the Mosque my Grandfather goes to has space for Women. [Its tiny!]

After doing a bit of research, I realised there were several reasons for this.

Firstly, most of the Sub-Continent Muslim Countries are followers of the Hanafi Madhab. [For those of you who do not know what I'm talking about, google it].

The Hanafi Madhab is the madhab of Imam Abu Hanfiah [rahimullah] and in some cases highly discourages Women to go into Masajids to pray. However, in Islam there is no actual prevention for Women to go to pray in Mosques but the reward for Women to pray in their houses is better.

There is a difference here. What people have done is, they’ve taken the ‘discouraged’ part and have made it ‘haram’. I’ve heard in some places in India where Women are physically stopped and absolutely forbidden to go to the Mosques. This is not Islam. The houses of Allah are for both Men and Women.

Yes, for a Woman it is more rewarding that she prays in her house, but there is no prohibition for them to go to the Mosques.

Abdullah Bin Mas’ud reported the Prophet (pbuh) as saying: It is more excellent for a woman to pray in her house than in her courtyard, and more excellent for her to pray in her private chamber than in her house. [Sunan Abu Dawood Vol.1 Chapter 204 Hadith No.570]

In fact, in some cases the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam asked that the Women go to the Mosque [For example: Eid Prayers] and certain Ulema also, especially in our times say Women should go to the Masajids when they are not getting Islamic knowledge at home.

Let us go into the time of the Prophet Muhammad sallalahu alayhi wasallam. The Women were very much active in all parts of the religion. Ayesha radi Allahu anh is ranked as one of the greatest scholars of ahadith. They were teachers, Mothers, Nurses. They were seekers of knowledge. A Woman once argued with Umar Ibn Al Khattab radi Allahu anh and won. Umar – who was one of the greatest and strongest Man of that time, one of the four righteous Caliphs and a close companion of the Prophet SAWs. And yet, a Woman won an arguement with him on a religious issue.

There are clear narrations that Women too would sometimes go to pray in congregation in the Mosques. When Umar Ibn Al Khattab [Radi Allahu Anh] was martyred, his wife was praying in congregation behind him. There is no case or incident that has been narrated that the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam actually stopped Women from coming into the Masajids.

In fact, he did quite the opposite:

The Prophet (pbuh) said, ‘Do not prevent the female servants of Allah from going to the mosque of Allah.’ [Sahih Muslim Vol.1 Chapter 177 Hadith No.886]

“If the wife of any one of you asks permission (to go to the mosque) do not forbid her.” (Sahih Bukhari Volume 1, Book of Salaah, Chapter 80, Hadith No. 832)

I’m not advocating that Women go for every Salaah to the Masjid, what I’m advocating though is that Women should not be prevented from the Mosques and should be active members in their community.

I feel the need for this is now more than before. And the reasons why I think so is because:

• In our times I’ve notices a certain amount of jahilliya [lack of knowledge] among Women when it comes to religious knowledge.The Mosque provides the alternative for this, attending a Friday prayer and listening to a Khutbah helps in attaining knowledge.

• I find it exceptionally hypocritical that Women in these socieites are allowed to do all sorts of things. Like going to the Mall, Cinemas, for Food, Shopping, Universities, Work – but when it comes to going to the Masjid, for religious and spiritual knowledge – its ‘Astagfirullah!’.

• Women are the Mothers of each generation. They are the teachers of their children and their houses. If Women are not active in the religion, then who will teach the children, generation after generation? [And I'm not talking about secular education here...]

• With Women not being allowed to go to Masajids and in some cases, no section of place being alotted for Women whatsoever a huge probem arises. We need to accept that fact that Women in our times do not always stay home, regardless how religious they are. There are a hundred and one things that need to be dealt with – and what if she is out and about shopping and the time for Salaah comes? There will be no place for her to pray! A prayer missed without a reason, regardless of how much you make it up, is not the same.

I don’t have anything against the Hanafi Madhab per se [Incase I start getting hate comments ] but I am against how somethings are being [mis] interpreted and how blind following should not be how we shoud be following our religion.

We need to go back to the authentic sources of the Qurán and Sunnah and give each other our rights.

Khao, Beta, Khao!

So I went to my fourth dawat yesterday. I know I should be happy, dawaats are supposed to be fun right? But they aren’t. Especially when they happen one after the other and all of them have the same old procedure. And especially when they happen 5-6 times, consecutively.

So the one I went to yesterday contained a particular Uncle who insisted I eat. And no, not just once. He did it about 10-15 times. To the point where I was thinking I’m going to have a nightmare which would include, ‘Khao, beta, khao!’.

I love food, and I love the process of making it and eating it. However, this time, I was actually tired of chewing the naan and the Kebab the Uncle kept on putting on my plate. As it is, it’s not like I need anymore extra flab on me.

It ended with him pushing a bowl of kulfi infront of me, of which I just had a few bites to please him. And all the while I was eating, I kept on thinking that either I was going to throw up tonight or have an awful stomach-ache.

Khair, I have a wedding to go to tomorrow and another dawat, which I’m going to wriggle out of. There is no way I’m going through another one to suffer.

The food is good, it’s just that my stomach is a stomach and not a house.

Anyway, I finally met up with ON/Falsa – another EX-blogger [Who I'm trying to get blogging again].  Who blogs at:- http://www.falsaqueen.com

I went to her place and we had a lot of fun, alhamdulilah.  Staying true to my blog, I wore purple! [Okay - that happened without thinking. I should've worn Purple to the blogger meet. ]  We had chai sitting on the swing in her verandah overlooking the garden being drenched with rain where we talked non-stop. It was very comforting, if not peaceful. I’ve talked so much that my throat is now hoarse from talking.

We went through the usual girl talk, discussing ‘issues’. Apparently, we’re very similar. We both love travelling, food and we came to the conclusion that we’re a weird mixture of religious and crazy. I gave in to temptation for a minute and stood in the rain. But that was it. Although I’m going to give in i’m sure again when it rains and for much longer. Cold/Cough be damned!

Her Mom is a sweet-heart She made sure ON was the proper host and that I had the haleem, Sandwhiches, Samosas, Chai and gajar ka halwa, which were all really good. [And no, this wasn't like the Uncle story above - lol]. I’m hoping I can meet her again for lunch once before I leave inshaAllah.

PS: I’m loving the rain in Karachi! It was raining really heavily back home and I was regretting not being there  because of the weather, but now I’m happy.

Bloggers Meet & Other stuff

So I met a couple of  Karachiite bloggers last night, it was fun. The details are at Karachiwalis blog post.

And so are my comments/impressions, etc.

My Cough/Cold seems to be getting worse by the day, and now to top it all I’m down with fever, again. Usually I’m not so bothered when I get a cold/cough, but this time its gone on for about half a month and I’m on vacation right now, so I really don’t want to stay ill. And if I get too ill, I tend to faint. I’ve gotten all my check-ups done but no one can figure out why I faint if I get ill. All the fluids in my body are normal and no, I’m not anemic. [The first time it happened was in a market here in Karachi a couple of years back.  Oh the embarrassment!]

My seats get extended… again. Sigh. First it was the 16th, then it became the 18th and now it’s either 20th or 21st of December. I’m traveling with my Dad and he wants to stay a little longer. I don’t actually mind staying longer [I'm not bored of Karachi as yet besides, I still need to shop and eat out], but I have important things to sort out back home.

Besides that, the dawats here seem to be never-ending. Karachites are very social. We have one to go today, and another one to go to tomorrow. I’m not exactly looking forward to the one tomorrow. It’s at my Sisters in-laws, and apparently my Sisters husbands brothers Wife was desperately trying to hook me up with her brother.

Sigh. Talk about being awkard. I really hope hes not there. I usually use the ‘I’m so religious that I’m an extremist’ appearance/excuse to put off un-wanted potentials but turns out, he’s religious too!

PS- Mad props to Muntadar Al Zaidi for throwing shoes at Bush! He’s made history and according to a lot of people, done what other Muslim Leaders should’ve done long time ago.

A trip to K-City

So I have a flight for Karachi on the 8th of December for the evening. I thought I’d be excited [I'm going after a few years], but surprisingly my excitement has sort of died down. I think it was the whole process of, ‘Oh we’re going! … No, we’re not! Ok-ay, we’re going again! But… no seats! Wait, seats might get done… might not… might get done… might not… might get done… Names in the waiting list… Are we going?.. Final verdict by the Parents: We’re not going! It’s not safe enough – Enough is enough… Cousin Calls – seats are done!’

We had four different people trying in two different parts of the World for our seats. I just realised how much Karachiites must love their city, the flights are all freaking packed!

Our house is a mess, or more appropriately according to my Mom, ‘A Jungle or a bhangar khaana’. There are suitcases strewn here and there, the dining hall has turned into our packing area and there are clothes in literally every room in the house. [Ok-ay, maybe not the kitchen or the bathrooms], but well, you get the picture. This is what happens when we do ‘rushed packing’. Not to mention, 8th of December is Eid here!!!

My Sister is leaving tomorrow because her seat got done for the 7th as there were no more seats available for the 8th.

I feel that I have *so* much to do but I don’t know where to start. I think I stress for no particular reason about every itsy bitsy little thing. I think more so now because I wasn’t prepared for this particular trip and was planning to spend Eid here. My hennas not done [Although that should be the least of my worries right now], and I won’t get time to get it done in Karachi, because we’re going to reach there at night but I doubt Qurtuba do midnight henna. Heh.

I probably like a stupid ditzy female worrying about Henna when I have a bucket load of work to do, but whatever.

I’m nearly done with my packing, i don’t need to keep a lot anyway considering nearly all my shalwar kameez are already in Pak, just need to keep a more skirts/t-shirts and I’m going to for a little last minute shopping for a pair of jeans the mall with my Sister in the morning and see if I can get a few gifts too for the cousins. [And you're probably thinking, what in the world is she going getting Western clothing to Pakistan?Well, ladies and gentlemen, the advantage of wearing an Abaya/Hijab is that no-one knows what you're wearing inside! ]

And to be honest, it’s way more comfortable then handling shalwar kameez. Shalwar Kameez is the way to go if you’re in Karachi and other parts of Pakistan, however wearing an Abaya gives you the benefit of wearing whatever you want. Although, God Forbid Aunties get a peak of what you’re wearing inside! Too many times I’ve heard the ignorant comments of, ‘Oh she’s a Hijabi and she wears Western Clothing’.

Although 1) I always wear an Abaya everywhere, including here and recently in Pakistan too – and if not, i’m in SK and I have a chador perfectly draped around with an added Hijab if i’m in Pakland.

2) The only time they see me without it and Hijab is when it’s all girls – so Islamically I’m not exactly sinning, but who is going to tell that to ignorant aunties?! [Aunties who don't cover themselves but like to criticise others!]

3) You can actually get away with being modest and wearing Western clothing at the same time. In fact, when I’d initially started out with Hijab [Just the headscarf] I’d colour combinate it with all my skirts/dresses/tops. However, no matter how decent you look even with Hijab, Western clothing isn’t exactly the best option in some parts of Pakistan. I guess every place and country has what is ‘acceptable’ and what is not ‘acceptable’, regardless of religion or anything else.

Anyway, before this turns into another post about Aunties I’m going to give it an end. I can feel the excitement build up again… I just spoke to my cousins, and they’re already planning a halwa pouri nashta. It’s not halwa pouri Im exactly excited about, but the re-union!

Complaints

I’ve realised I come here to blog mostly when I’m either going through stressful problems or in the mood to write little fictional/not-so-fictional pretty extracts. But, in my defense, I usually do go through normal phases of life too.

I’m so stressed out with everything right now. I have to make so many decision and I really hope that the decisions I make are the right ones. Sometimes, your life is so stable, steady and easy while at other times its a wild jungle.

I don’t know what’s happening about going to Karachi, we can’t find seats because all the flights are jam packed but my Cousin who is currently in Canada knows someone and is trying to get them done. I don’t know how he, living all the way there is going to do it, but I guess I’ll have to trust him because he is known to be resourceful. We’re going to be having a little re-union this Eid I think, considering all my aunts and uncles from Canada are also going to be coming, it’ll be fun, spending Eid together with the Cousins.

But I’m stressed [again] about going, finding seats back on time are going to be a hassle, I can only stay till 16-17th of december max because I need to be back and we can’t find seats later then the 20th. And then I’m also tempted to stay longer because my Mom and Sisters are planning to stay till the 25th of december. Gah. My neice and nephew and sister will be coming down from Isloo if we decide to go this Eid, and lets just I’m really longing to see them.

Not to mention, the current ‘halaat’ about Karachi, we keep on hearing things about people being killed and girls being kidnapped and raped. My own Cousin was kidnapped a month or so back, and lets just say it was a horrible month, not knowing if he was going to come back alive or not. Alhamdulilah they let him go after a month. Anyway, he was over with his wife a few days back and he told us some pretty scary stuff. So, this might sound cowardly, but I’m actually slightly hesitant [if not scared] about going.

After that incident, there was a ban on all the guys in our khandaan to stop their late night rendezvous and outings, so basically I was just thinking, if the guys aren’t allowed out so much, the girls won’t be either. So we won’t be having THAT much fun apparently.

Aside from karachi issues… i got… a job offer! SIGH. It’s a good position, they’re okay about me doing hijab/niqab, its an ok-ay environment and its related to the field I’m planning to go into. Mainly Media and Journalism.

But I’m hesitant and nervous. I’ve never worked before and I’m going to admit, I think I lack confidence. I can easily be trodden over and I get shy. A lot. They’re two types of being shy, the one where you are shy, have haya, for the sake of Allah and the other where you’re shy of people. I think I have the latter in huge amounts. I’ve never been a people person much. I have stage fright, I suck at giving presentations and I like to keep to myself and close friends and loved ones.

It’s true, I live in my own bubble. I rarely go into mixed environments because I’ve taken a year and a half-off from University, my days consist of learning and memorising Qurán, Internet, meeting my friends who are all practicing, going for Islamic lectures and writing articles for the organisations I work for. Subconciously, I probably don’t and don’t want to to venture into the big bad world. But, you got to do, what you got to do right?

A part of me has always wanted to be out there, doing something. And, not the feminist sort, career oriented person. [Although to an extent there is nothing wrong with it], But because I know I have certain talents which I don’t want to go to waste and If I can use them to help better the Ummah, to make a difference, why not?

And then… I had a thought. Is it actually so necessary for me to work? My family is going to provide for me till the day I get married, do I fit the position of the Women who are allowed to work according to Shariah? While on the other hand I really do want to work and my Parents don’t have an issue with it.

I think if they weren’t cool about me covering my face, I would still not have done it, but they are [Although I'm not strict about Niqaab infront of cousins, I wear out] and the person who contacted me for the position is also pretty religious himself. [Although these don't answer the above questions... gah]. It’s hard finding work with Hijab/Abaya/Niqaab sometimes and I spoke to a few Women who are working and do strict pardah and they said if this Job is walking upto you itself, you shouldn’t let it go to waste.

Khair, all they require is good English apparently. I sent in my CV, got a call today and I need to answer some questions before I get called for an interview. I spoke to the person who contacted me for it, [It's the same guy I'm writing for] and he said all they need is good English… and apparently considering I have an English accent, I’ll get in easy.

Which led me to a thought, why is our society so in awe of the West? What should an accent matter? Why are people so highly thought off if they have an American/British accent? I mean, what if I didn’t have an American or British accent? What about all my other qualities? They are looking at my written work though but still, I know a lot of people who get in other organisations because they look and speak good.

Anotehr thing was, I need to balance Qurán and this if I get accepted. I go for Qurán eveyrday in the morning from 8 to 1PM and work timings would be from 7:30am to 2:30pm. And this was making me go crazy, i can do this as a correspondance course at home, but it wont be the same as I wont have the pressure of giving a test everyday. Sucks right?

On top, I’m also coming down with a stupid dreaded SORE THROAT.

Sigh, it felt good letting all that out. And in the end, no matter how much I try, I’m still not grateful enough for what I have, I’m sure there are people worse than me.

Grrrr…

In one of my previous posts I talked about not-so-nice embarrassing incidents which seemed to have been occurring with me for the past few weeks. I’d like to add a few more to the list:

- I burned my hand with hot boiling water. Alhamdulilah, its healed now.

- I have my Cousin and his wife over who are visiting the Country, and I usually walk around in my Abaya/Hijab around the house over my clothes whenever we have male [Non-Mehram] relatives over… because well its very convenient and usually my Cousins are careful because they know I do Hijab, so they knock before entering anywhere and/or clear their throats before coming in. My brother-in-law is over too, so I just don’t take the risk.

Khair, I had this really bad incident, where I, not knowing that one of my other [male] Cousin had also come over stupidly walked into the Kitchen trying to find my Mom to tell her that I was going to be going out. I just wanted to *bang* my head against the wall later. I promptly ran back the way I came from.

Only Women who wear Hijab can relate to the feeling the one goes through during these utterly horrible incidents. Gah! It was ultra embarrassing for both me and him I’m sure. Especially, considering I’ve been doing Hijab from them for years and they haven’t seen me without it, not to mention ridiculously awkard! I was cringing for ages after.

There is nothing you an do about it though except to meet them again pretending nothing happened. Sigh. Usually these incidents happen when I’m in Pakiland because of the numerous population of Cousins who all like to come together [MashaAllah].

Anyway, talking about P – Land, I might be visiting K-City [Karachi] in a couple of days for Eid… that is if we get seats. Apparently, all the flights are booked now and we were indecisive [And I still am!] about going before. If not for Eid, maybe for a few days after Eid.

The reasons for me being indecisive about visiting are quite a few, I think I’ll write a post on it. :p

But, it has to be said, Baqra Eids in Karachi are fun if nothing else. Last time I spent it there, all of us Cousins would wake up everyday in the morning, fill into the cars and drive down to some area near Tariq Road and watch Camels get slaughtered. [Not for the weak of heart!] In fact, because there were quite a few of us girls standing, and the crowd was moving back and forth in tune with the actions of the Camel, this Family were telling all the girls go up on their balcony and watch from a ’safe distance’. Lol, pretty sweet I would say.

[And I can't believe I'm ending this post on a positive note].